Clipped Wings

Clipped Wings

Description

C L I P P E D W I N G S
I am a Wiradjuri woman, artist, mother
upheld with the power of my eagle totem
A bowerbird by nature
I have always wrestled with the idea of ‘home’
a roof?
a river?
a sky?
I have been force-fed the illusion that
with a home
I will find
security
possibility
safety
And
with that
a guaranteed sense of freedom
That is
if the pockets are deep
and the dreamer is able
At times
feeling trapped and breathless
my home will close in on me
Caged
with doors wide open
the ‘home’ for which my spirt longs
is that of ‘country’
A nest abandoned generations ago
not by choice
but by force
by hurt
and ongoing pain
I constantly search
high and low
in- and out-side myself
for a key to unlock a rusty door
Subconsciously
I found myself collecting bird cages
a symbol of the confinement that haunts me
Then I came across the shell of a caravan
no walls
no windows
sadly, no wheels
The great Aussie escape sits in my driveway
it offers
open roads
adventure
an affordable roof
A roof
often seen
as a palace by the homeless
With links to retirement
a sign of hope
I embedded my cages in it’s frame
the cage doors are left open
for the day I will stretch my wings in flight
This country’s history has clipped my wings
rendering me an unbalanced bird
unbalanced as I carry my family’s trauma
along with my own
which I have nurtured
with modern poisons
I may be a one-winged bird
or a carefully clipped pet
either way
I am irritated
as I sit with significant discomfort
The purpose
no matter how long ago
was to keep me flightless
under control
and less likely to wonder
Wings or not
this eagle woman has become outspoken
harder to contain
restricted independence has not tamed me

Karla Dickens